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February 23 2012

andrewmyles
16:33
Tags: DW
Reposted fromikari ikari viaTARDIS TARDIS

February 20 2012

andrewmyles
18:13
I love our customers, I really do. But some days we get some strange people in our shop. Here are some gems I'd like to share.

---

Customer: Excuse me, do you have any signed copies of Shakespeare plays?
Me: Er... do you mean signed by the people who performed the play?
Customer: No, I mean signed by William Shakespeare.
Me: .....*headdesk*

----

Customer: Hi, I'd like to return this book, please.
Me: Do you have the receipt?
Customer: Here.
Me: Erm, you bought this book at Waterstone's.
Customer: Yes.
Me:.... we're not Waterstone's.
Customer: But, you're a bookshop.
Me: Yes, but we're not Waterstone's.
Customer: You're all part of the same chain.
Me: No, sorry, we're an independent bookshop.
Customer: ....
Me: Put it this way, you wouldn't buy clothes in H&M and take them back to Zara, would you?
Customer: Well, no, because they're different shops.
Me: Exactly.
Customer:... I'd like to speak to your manager.

-----

Person: Hi, I'm looking for a Mr. Patrick.
Me: No one of that name works here, sorry.
Person: But does he live here?
Me:... no one lives here; we're a bookshop.
Person: Are you sure?

-----

on the phone
Me: Hello Ripping Yarns.
Customer: Do you have any mohair wool?
Me: Sorry, we're not a yarns shop, we're a bookshop.
Customer: You're called Ripping Yarns.
Me: Yes, that's 'yarns' as in stories.
Customer: Well it's a stupid name.
Me: It's a Monty Python reference.
Customer: So you don't sell wool?
Me: No.
Customer: Hmf. Ridiculous.
Me: ...but we do sell dead parrots.
Customer: What?
Me: Parrots. Dead. Extinct. Expired. Would you like one?
Customer: Erm, no.
Me: Ok, well if you change your mind, do call back.

-----

Customer: Hi, if I buy a book, read it, and bring it back, could I exchange it for another book?
Me: No... because then we wouldn't make any money.
Customer: Oh.

-----

Me: Ok, so with postage that brings your total to £13.05. One second and I'll get the card machine."
Customer: No. No, absolutely not. I demand that you charge me £12.99. I will not pay for anything that starts with thirteen. You're trying to give me bad luck. Now, change it or I will go to a bookshop who doesn't want me to fall down a hole and die. Ok?

-----

Customer: Hello, I'd like a copy of 'The Water Babies,' with nice illustrations. But I don't want to pay a lot of money for it, so could you show me what editions you do have so I can look at them, and then I can go and find one online?

-----

Customer: Do you sell ipod chargers?

-----

Man: Hi, I've just self-published my art book. My friends tell me that I'm the new Van Gogh. How many copies of my book would you like to order?

-----

Woman: Hi, my daughter is going to come by on her way home from school to buy a book. But she seems to buy books with sex in them and she's only twelve, so can I ask you to keep an eye out for her and make sure she doesn't buy anything inappropriate for her age? I can give you a list of authors she's allowed to buy.
Me: With all due respect, would it not be easier for you to come in with your daughter?
Woman: Certainly not. She's a grown girl, she can do it herself.

----

Customer: Do you have any books on the dark arts?
Me: ...No.
Customer: Do you have any idea where I could find some?
Me: Why don't you try Knockturn Alley?
Customer: Where's that?
Me: Oh, the centre of London.
Customer: Thanks, I'll keep my eyes peeled for it.

-----

Customer: I read a book in the eighties. I don't remember the author, or the title. But it was green, and it made me laugh. Do you know which one I mean?

----
Customer: Do you have 'Windows 7 for Dummies'?
Me: Sorry, we're an antiquarian bookshop; nearly everything in here pre-dates computers.
Customer: Oh. Do you have user guide for antiquarian computers? You know from, like, the olden days, when they had swords and stuff?  
Me: ...?

--

Customer: Do you have, like, a Christmas book about that, like, really famous baby?

--

Customer: Do you think you could post this book to America for me, in time for Christmas?
Me: Yes. I'm sure we could. I'll just get the scales and I can work out postage costs for you.
Customer: You expect me to pay for the postage as well? I'm already paying for the book!
Me: ...

--

the real Mr Scrooge...
Customer: I'd like a Christmas book, about Christmas, that doesn't have anything to do with snow, or robins, or snowmen, or Jesus, or holly.
Me: ... right.
Customer: And no bloody carols, either!


--

Customer: Do you have any cards?
Me: We have some old postcards in a box by the door. Some of them have already been written on, though.
Customer: Oh, do you have one that says 'To Juliette, with love from Christine'? It would save me writing it out again, you see.
Reposted fromcelaeno celaeno viawywietrznik wywietrznik
andrewmyles
11:44
9753 578c 500
Tags: MLP GIF
Reposted fromNeutrum Neutrum viabronies bronies

January 29 2012

andrewmyles
18:18
9859 f8f0
Tags: MLP GIF
Reposted fromKrzychulec Krzychulec viabronies bronies
andrewmyles
18:17
9781 3faa 500
Tags: MLP GIF
Reposted fromKrzychulec Krzychulec viabronies bronies
01:18
Play fullscreen

thelyragw:

melislestrade:

Neil Gaiman on Copyright Piracy and the Web

“Places where I was being pirated […] I was selling more and more books. People were discovering me through being pirated. And then they were going out and buying the real books”

“Nobody who would’ve bought your book is not buying it because they can find it for free. What you’re actually doing is advertising, you’re reaching more people, you’re raising awareness.”

I FUCKING LOVE THIS MAN!!!!! I DISCOVERED ALL OF MY FAVE BANDS/FANDOMS BY WATCHING VIDS. AND THEN I PAID FOR DVDS/CDS.

THANK YOU, NEIL GAIMAN ♥

andrewmyles
01:04
7390 0370
Tags: PL
Reposted frommartynkowa martynkowa viaKrzychulec Krzychulec

January 28 2012

20:15
4148 57cb

alicevalium:

dancing-in-the-tardis:

gettingshirty:

Doctor Who & Sherlock crossover? Yes please!

Yes. Yes. Yes. This is genius. 

DEAR LORD LET ME LOVE YOU

Tags: DW GIF
Reposted fromMerelyGifted MerelyGifted viaTARDIS TARDIS
andrewmyles
16:35
Tags: MLP
Reposted fromvermillionlove vermillionlove viabronies bronies
andrewmyles
16:34
Tags: MLP
Reposted fromsofakissen sofakissen viabronies bronies
andrewmyles
13:34
8730 7d9b 500
Tags: MLP
Reposted fromEsia Esia
andrewmyles
13:34
9212 2015 500
Tags: MLP
Reposted fromEsia Esia
andrewmyles
13:32
6960 3f67 500
Tags: DW
Reposted fromTARDIS TARDIS viaEsia Esia
andrewmyles
13:32
1140 27d6
Reposted fromkanadinol kanadinol viaEsia Esia
andrewmyles
13:32
Tags: MLP
Reposted fromEsia Esia
andrewmyles
13:30
Tags: MLP
Reposted frombronies bronies viaEsia Esia
andrewmyles
13:11
5483 e44d 500
Tags: PL
Reposted fromchowmein chowmein viapl pl
andrewmyles
13:10
Dodawanie kostki rosołowej do rosołu jest trochę jak dodawanie jajek w proszku do jajecznicy.
Albo Zbigniewa Hołdysa do programu publicystycznego.
— Igor Zalewski, felieton z Uważam Rze 3/2012
Tags: PL
Reposted fromRockYourMind RockYourMind
andrewmyles
13:04
2198 f53d
Tags: PL acta
Reposted fromlllm lllm viapl pl
andrewmyles
13:03
Tags: PL acta
Reposted fromlouve louve viapl pl
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